Moody

And I can't seem to find a single movie that talks to me right now, hundreds of movies on Amazon Prime, and not a single one of them talks to me, and most are so dern predictable.

Most movies are simple gosh dern love stories.

First the man, then here comes the woman, they never get along at first, then by end of movie making love...so gosh dern predictable, always the same gosh dern thing.

Give me something different for crying out loud!

In a prolonged odd happy or content mood, for no apparent reason

Am I complaining about being in a decent mood?

Not really, but I do find it odd, cause the mood isn't linked to anything measurable, other than having a good conversation with someone yesterday.

Is it that I've finally found someone that I feel I can trust to be my power of attorney one day?

Is that it?

I mean symbolically what does that me to me?

If I can play my own phycologist for a minute, let's see.

1. It means you've finally closed the link to nothingness, and the majority of people have no idea what it feels like to literaly have no one in your life that either cares for you or that you care for, no one.

And maybe it's been a burden to carry that for years, not even having anyone that I can leave my stuff with, that can be a very empty feeling, knowing that if you die, there's no one on the whole planet who'd even want your stuff.

And so maybe knowing who you want to be your power of atterney has given you peace, a peace you haven't had in over a decade.

Is that really why I'm in a good mood for no reason, could it be over something like that? (I ask myself)

Do I feel less alone in this world now?

hmm

It could be, I just don't know, maybe it is that simple, simple as just needing someone in my life I feel I can trust, maybe it really is that simple.

Since I've gotten off from work, a few hours ago, my mind has been blank.
Not depressed or anything, just that mind is blank.
I have tomorrow off, worked earlier today, hated it, maybe that's why my mind has been blank.

I need to get started on another episode of 'Gen X radio', but again, my mind is just blank..open.spotify.com/episode/5FaqM6fiOouvd5pBNXcp7T , that last episode, which can be heard on spotify, was good, but now my mind is blank, burn out?

I don't know.
I just need something compelling to theme new show on, other than day to day politics and news.

I won't say I'm 'moody', but will say my physiological mood has been odd lately.
Maybe odd is the wrong word.

Physiological means the physical, which can include the body and mind or state of or health of.

Aging is odd in and of itself, cause you're not sure if suppose to feel certain ways as you age, or is it do to diet, vitamins, health, ect.

Women go through menopause, do also males go through something similar?

Who knows, all I know is I'm still alive, and in relatively decent health.

Tomorrow feels like death to me.
Actually, just about every tomorrow has been feeling like death to me for a while.

Everything is just annoying the hell out of me right now.

I hate weak people who whisper behind your back, who whisper behind the scenes, and never confront the person they're whispering about to see whether or not it's true or justified and or if it even matters.

I hate how everything always seems to break down at once, like 4-5 things all at once.

I hate weak people who hide behind their job or career titles.

I hate White Christains who pretend they're not racists, just because they believe they're a Christian.

I see their racism oozing out of them regardless what God they serve...and Black folks as well.
Black folks are racist as heck also, and so is everyone else on the planet...accept maybe those who were born blind.

I hate how google decides who gets ahead, gets seen on line, and who doesn't.

I'm just in a crabby mood, it's what happens when you begin running low on money, you get crabby.