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Post by Admin on Apr 21, 2023 1:14:23 GMT
Thursday  I come home from work feeling so hollow on the inside, gutted, that's just what a long day of mindless driving labor will do to ya, especially if when home, there's no one there to perk you up. There used to be more to life than this for me, and I'm sure there still is, it's just up to me to get things moving again in a more fun direction. Usually if you're surrounded by love, than direction really doesn't matter, but when unloved, direction does matter, cause you have to forge a future that at least you believe will yield you some joy. It's all pipe dream though, the older you get the more you realize most of it is a pipe dream.
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Post by Admin on Jun 2, 2023 2:26:40 GMT
I'm off tomorrow, worked today, at home now, and bored, unmotivated.
I'm sober, not drinking, and don't know what to do with myself on this bland Thursday night.
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Post by Admin on Jun 9, 2023 1:48:46 GMT
Not sure if I work tomorrow or not, the app I look at that determines that has been acting up lately, so I think I'll wake up early anyways, incase they assign me a trip overnight.
That aside, just another meaningless workday.
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Post by Admin on Jun 22, 2023 11:38:39 GMT
Thursday is here, but I'm glad I'm not stuck in a submarine, 12,000 feet below the surface of the water, in the Atlantic ocean.
Looks like the Titanic is still claiming lives, even today.
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Post by Admin on Jun 22, 2023 11:46:19 GMT
 Some of us get to a point in our lifes journey where you realize you just can't win, and will never score big in this life. You wake up, and the minute you leave your place are a dart board for others to verbally or suspiciously or ect, their negative energy at, yet you still must or have to go on. There is no time out, when you're an adult, sure, maybe if you're wealthy, but if of the working class poor, there is no time out, ever. Life, people in life, continue to pound away at you until one day just gone. |
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Post by Admin on Sept 29, 2023 2:34:31 GMT
It's Thursday, so what
When there's no one to love, or who loves you, it's like 'so what, so it's Thursday'.
I don't always feel like that, but today I do.
I work tomorrow, so can't drink, won't drink, so there's no escaping my day created mood.
Maybe some movies on Amazon might help me relax.
And then I start work late, which means I must stay up late, or I'll wake up like at 3 am and just lay there.
Or maybe I should just enjoy the fact that at the moment, there is no drama in my life (immediate drama that is)
Maybe I should enjoy the fact that I can come home and it's quiet, and clean, and no one or nothing is bothering me.
Maybe one day I'll look back at these times with glee.
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Post by Admin on Oct 5, 2023 14:22:57 GMT
Slowly making a moral comeback from the near emotional meltdown I had the other night over stuff I just could not handle.
Not so much the 'stuff', but rather the typical lack of support I needed from a few, who as usual, just never there when it counts, or ever...I just lost it.
I don't feel good about that, but oh well...just texts.
And I deleted a lot of numbers from my phone as well...I think one older W dude was a fink.
I don't need anyone...I want others, but for whatever reason, in my realm of life, fate keeps me alone...
Nothing I can do about it.
All I can do, at this stage, is protect self from mental, moral and fiscal harm, and even that I can't or won't always be able to do.
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Post by Admin on Oct 6, 2023 3:50:13 GMT
A rare Thursday on here A rare Thursday indeed on here. I'll never be great, my art work will never be appreciated, yet my art work and portraits rival any, but I'm not in the right social clubs, not apart of the right class of people. I'm gutter and alley to them. I write more than anyone on the planet, yet no one acknowledges that, instead people ghost read, and no telling how much of my stuff is stolen. But that's how humans are. ----------------------- Anyways, it's Thursday, which means it's a dull day, I can't think of anything big, grand or exciting that has ever occurred in my life on a Thursday, or breaking news, as far as that goes. It's Thursday, but it's also my Monday, also, it's finally October, but in my world, it's pretty much October and Halloween every single day of the year, and with that I'm going to send this post off into the vestals of blog history...happy October and soon to be Halloween! 
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Post by Admin on Dec 14, 2023 13:13:55 GMT
Thursday It's Thursday, it's just another long dull work day to me.
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Post by Admin on May 9, 2024 15:20:07 GMT
I've got a lot of stuff to get done today, mainly 'assigned lesson plan' type of stuff, but that 'stuff' is everything to me right now and my future.
It's all about time and mind management, something I've been sloppy at in the past, and even now.
One thing for sure, drinking and time management do not go hand in hand at all.
Drinking will through everything off.
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Also, religion, religious people, why do they always assume everyone who isn't religious or constantly claiming to worship god is in a state of sin or sinning?
It's a phycological defect to me, and one that robs you of your happiness when always concerned with what others are doing.
Some figure that out and walk away from that mindset, others take it to their grave.
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Anyways, I got to start the day now, been putting it off long enough.
Mainly writing, studying and lots of thinking, for this screenplay I have to write.
It's Thursday, and I'm still here.
The older I get/live, the less sense my life path makes to me.
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Post by Admin on May 9, 2024 15:21:14 GMT
ThursdayIt's Thursday, it's just another long dull work day to me. Well thankfully, these long dull workdays are in the past, at least for now, but the void has been filled with long study and read days now. |
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Post by Admin on Jun 6, 2024 13:15:21 GMT
It's just after 9 am...I'm just getting up...can only lay on a stiff air mattress for so long.
What am I going to do today?...hmm.
Post office, film school stuff, read, get dressed, groom.
I need some more clothes...after place burned down, I have limited clothes, had to buy cheap stuff from like discount clothing stores and Walmart.
Maybe I'll start the day off by working out...fitness is and always be key to a better life.
I'd rather be homeless yet healthy than rich and unhealthy.
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Post by Admin on Jun 6, 2024 13:17:28 GMT
I'll start the day by organizing and cleaning my room, and my face and my hair and body, then from there we shall see.
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Post by Admin on Sept 20, 2024 1:53:23 GMT
Today has been a total bust, to late to save it Today has been a total bust, and it's to late to save it. It's all about the mood. I did get in a decent workout though, but that's it. Got in a text argument with my ____ last night while drinking, that sure hasn't helped my mood any. Apologizing means nothing to people, forgiveness is more powerful than apologizing. for if you apologize to someone who's incapable of forgiving you, than what's the point, just save yourself the humiliation. --------------------------------- Anyways, I sit here, late at night, in some kind of a self-imposed mental dead zone.
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Post by Admin on Oct 17, 2024 15:48:11 GMT
It's Thursday, spent all yesterday traveling, got back late last night, flew back in, and the whole trip sucked, and then some.
Flying is so overrated, there's nothing fun about it anymore to me, nothing.
The lines, the intrusion into your personal stuff, and space, and being.
When you travel you're like reduced to nothing, cattle...not just me though, others...saw even a family with a baby stroller humiliated as the TSA made them remove their two kids from the stroller and examined the stroller.
The parents kept very calm, probably more calm than I would have been, for sure...but they were foreign.
Anyways, from one hell, to another, as I now have to navigate my own evolving situation.
Every path seems full of thorns to me right now.
Obviously, for my own mental health, I have to change that outlook...but it will take time, and sorting through thoughts, ideas and whatever.
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