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Post by Admin on Jul 22, 2024 0:56:54 GMT
When sober, you can't run away from your emotional demons or monsters.
When sober, you have to face yourself head on, no if and or buts about it.
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Post by Admin on Jul 29, 2024 12:53:03 GMT
Since stopped drinking by I'd say 95% or more, I do notice now that certain inner muscle pains and joint knee soreness are noticeably declining...in other words my over all noticeable health does seem to be improving.
But the one thing that I can't seem to improve is my face, at least how it looks in the morning when get out of bed.
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Post by Admin on Jul 29, 2024 21:42:11 GMT
Now that not drinking on a regular basis, I find I have less reasons to leave my residents.
Not only that, but with the price of beer now, I've gotta be saving at least $100.oo a month or more in beer.
I mean a 4-pack is what now? $5 dollar average, plus when buy beer usually buy other stuff as well when at the store, or single cans, so can spend 15-20 dollars per trip, and if making 3-5 of those trips a week, it can add up.
Yep, I'm saving money by not buying beer or sometimes, but rarely liquor anymore.
And when I do or did buy liquor, it was always those really small half pint or less bottles.
But when I see others buy lquor, wow, they buy the full sized gigantic bottles, I'm talking women yo.
Hell no I couldn't handle that, I'd become a maniac, a lunatic, I'd be out of control for sure.
So in a way, my drinking is miniscule when compared to others, but still to much for me....is what so trying to stop, and doing a decent job at it, so far.
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Post by Admin on Jul 29, 2024 21:44:03 GMT
Also, when not drinking, I just have the urge to snack all day, that isn't good either.
But when drinking beer, you're belly is always full, when not drinking, your belly is empty, so your body get's used to a full belly and will make you feel hungry all day to substitute for the lack of beer in your belly.
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Post by Admin on Jul 29, 2024 21:45:31 GMT
Sometimes I wish I could smoke some weed, yeah, why not.
Now would be the perfect time since unemployed...but since I don't know anyone here, since I have no friends here, I have no one to get any weed from...I suppose that's good...hmm.
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Post by Admin on Jul 29, 2024 21:48:34 GMT
But you know what, getting weed or any other drugs from the streets now is a scary and risky thing with life killing fetynal in everything.
You never know when could get a hot dose...I mean I hear dealers lace just about everything with fetynal now, even sometimes local dealers don't even know what the drug they're dealing is laced with.
If live in a state where weed is legal, best to get it from a lab or weed store...sadly I do not live in such a state at the moment...and again, maybe that's a good thing.
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Post by Admin on Aug 4, 2024 6:10:30 GMT
When you stop drinking, there's like so many levels of healing your body goes through, and it can take weeks, even months, to get back to a healthy normal.
But the journey to that healthy normal can be fascinating, like being given a new body and mind.
Not that your luck or circumstances will change, but you do give yourself a better chance in this world, while alive, when you're healthy and whole vs being sickly and drunk.
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Post by Admin on Aug 4, 2024 6:20:23 GMT
Wow, even though ate very small portion of steak, from Public, ice-cream before bed, and just general snacking all night long, I still lost weight when stepped on scale, and still plan on going back to bed, so will lose more weight before I get up later today.
Exercising daily now, being sober is quiet a journey, for sure, when you haven't been for a while.
Not that I was drinking every day, I wasn't. When employed, I didn't drink on my scheduled days of work, but when off for 2-4 days in a row, I'd drink...was drinking like 3-4 days a week, for years, with short breaks here and there.
Drinking was becoming a lifestyle for me.
I was fooling myself thinking I could maintain good health forever by doing that and then slipping in short workouts now and then at work.
I realize now I wasn't in shape...sure I could walk, climb stairs, workout in spurts, but I wasn't in shape.
These last few months have taught me a lot.
Sobriety beats being drunk all the time, for sure.
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Post by Admin on Aug 4, 2024 6:22:28 GMT
I only wish now my lust for women's legs and feet would come back...D'oh!  |
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Post by Admin on Aug 6, 2024 21:13:57 GMT
In the past, today has 'drink' written all over it, but this is not the past.
Still tempted though.
I mean I haven't escaped the clutches of beer just yet, it still tugs and pulls at me, but the results are always the same.
I get drunk, and nothing changes...and I wake up the next day feeling worse and feeling lazy, and a little less healthy.
Sobriety is a challenge, for sure, when so used to just drinking as a way of regulating your mood.
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Post by Admin on Aug 7, 2024 1:06:41 GMT
 So glad I didn't cave in and drink today. It's the last thing my mind and body would have needed. I gotta meet someone tomorrow to discuss an art project, and I need to be mentally sharp, enthused, focused and eager....drinking tonight would of stolen all that from me and I'd of shown up at meeting high on caffeine. ----------------------- The sobriety road is a long one, don't let anyone fool you. Drunkness is like gravity, it continues to pull at you weeks, months, after you've stopped drinking altogether or regularly. But the further you get away from that gravity, the easier it becomes to move in the opposite direction. I actually have energy right now, but my mind, my drive, is flat. My mind is out of alignment with my body, I suppose, at the moment and all day. But at least I didn't drink today, if nothing else, I'm happy about that. |
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Post by Admin on Aug 14, 2024 23:13:55 GMT
I feel like drinking right now, but don't want all the side effects I feel like drinking right now, or being emotionally taken to the spot drinking takes me to, but without the lingering side effects that always follow. Wish I could get that drunk utopic feeling, without actually flooding the body with booze, which is bad for you, of course. I'm working hard to get into shape, and I'm my own worst enemy, in that regard, most of us are indeed our own worst enemies. But now that sober, I have energy, and afternoons, evenings, just seem to drag when sober, and that's a good thing, cause time is precious. But what I'm saying is when it drags, it makes me want to drink to make the dragging time more fun to myself. That's just how drinkers think, I suppose. When going sober, you really have to totally re-arrange you're whole mindset. Even as I type this I feel like drinking, just so can relax.
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Post by Admin on Aug 14, 2024 23:22:36 GMT
Not only that, but I worked out twice today, just to bleed off some energy, and to counter all the time I'll be sitting and typing all evening...not sure if it worked.
When sober, you feel every minute of the day, the boredom...
I do have a doctors app tomorrow.
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Post by Admin on Aug 30, 2024 22:32:02 GMT
The hardest part about not drinking when used to drinking is...
The hardest part is learning not to cap off high emotional moments with booze, period.
Like in the past, if I got happy, I felt I could get happier with booze, or if I spoke on the phone with someone I enjoyed, I felt the conversation would be more enjoyable if I were drinking or drunk, and so forth.
It's learning how to just enjoy your natural emotional high, without feeling that some how booze can enhance it.
That's so very important to overcome that temptation or notion.
If you overcome that, that's 90% of the battle, at least with me.
Kind of the way a smoker pulls out a smoke every time they start talking to you on the street, etc...the same phycological phenom.
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Post by Admin on Aug 30, 2024 22:33:26 GMT
When I don't drink, I'm actually way more hyper and energetic, believe it or not.
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